Moulana Online Website
A Q&A service under the supervision of Moulana Nabi Raza Abidi, currently resident Aalim of SABA Islamic Center, San Francisco - San Jose - Bay Area, California.
Q1 - There is something I really want, it is an object, is there a special dua (supplication) I can recite to get it?
A - Salamun Alaykum. May Allah bless you and your family. Allah says in the Quran that Allah does not give human beings things except for what he or she works for. We need to work hard, take responsibility and be dutiful in order to achieve our goals and acquire what we want. However, before seeking that object, it is important, if possible, to get advice from experts and see if this object is good for us. Allah is our Rabb (Nurturer) and al-Qadeer (the Most Powerful), therefore He will do that what is best for us in order to help us fulfill our divine purpose. This means that Allah will give us what is best in fulfilling this divine purpose, and not necessarily what we want as what we want is not always what is best for us. Trust in Allah, continue praying, and read dua tawassul which is a good dua to recite on a daily basis.
Q2 - I am always in a state of doubt concerning the validity of my prayer, wudhu and ghusl. It can take me up to an hour to do ghusl, prayer and about twenty minutes for wudhu. Should I ignore my doubts?
A - Wa alaikum salam. May Allah bless you and your family. Yes someone who is katheer ash-shak (doubts a lot, multiple times in one action) should ignore their doubts until they can perform the actions normally without doubt.
Tip for conserving water and using it wisely and get rid of doubt: Ghusl should take a total of 5 minutes or less. In the first minute or two, pour water over the body and then for a few minutes wash it. For a minute or two use, use water to rinse off the soap and make an intention for ghusl. Take a minute to rinse your head and neck, one minute for the right side and one minute for the left side. Use a clock in the beginning to track the time so you can improve as you progress. This will help you get rid of your doubt (shakk).
Q3 - I want to try to stop my sister from backbiting behind my younger sister. My younger sister is sweet and she takes care of our mom. What should I do given that she isn’t listening to me?
A - Salamun Alaykum
May Allah bless you and your family. Your concern for your sister and wanting to guide her is indeed noble. Amr bil maroof, or inviting people towards good has different stages. You can try to show kindness and with love and care explain to her that backbiting is a sin. You can also slowly in your conversations explain to her that this is a great sin with serious consequences. If your words of guidance do not have an effect you can show your disapproval of her actions by politely excusing yourself when she engages in backbiting and make dua for her.
Also at times the trigger for backbiting can be something deeper such as an unhealthy relationships between the two or jealousy. If you are able to identify that and resolve those you will have a better result.
Q4 - Asalamalykum,
If an item becomes greasy with a najasa, i.e. handled by someone consuming a pork-containing product, after how long can one assume the grease dried out and no longer transfers najasa?
A - Salamun Alaykum
May Allah bless you and your family. The transfer of najaasah happens only through wetness. Therefore if your hands are dry najaasah will not transfer. Also you can wash your hands and make them taahir and then the najaasah will also not transfer.
Q5 - My friend was forced to marry a man, but now she wants to get out of the marriage. At the moment, she is being "blackmailed" as she lives in his home. She does not have money and does not have a family to fall back on, can you or the community offer some help?
A - Thank you for being there as a friend to a sister in need. However, these things should be dealt with experts and Muslim counselor experienced in matters of Islam and relationships. If she can find an Islamic counselor, preferably a scholar, she may get more relevant and helpful answers